12 January 2007

Hot maggots

Humour of the week

An American publisher has compiled a list of "the worst analogies ever written by pupils at US high schools". They include the following.

  • He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
  • John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
  • The hailstones leapt from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
The most literal-minded entry reads:
  • Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6.35pm travelling at 55mph, the other from Topeka at 4.19pm at a speed of 35mph.

Courtesy The Week.


james higham said...

I quite like the one though about the 'six-foot-three-inch tree'.

CityUnslicker said...

I have only just started reading your blog. it is reallyy quite good.

Will try to comment more often.

I don't believe this post though. I taught at a US university once upon a time and none of the students could write a sentence let alone an essay of any kind.

not_saussure said...

I agree with James; I think number one is really rather good.

And I think number four is super -- we've all been in relationships like that, surely, but never have we described them with such deadpan humour (even if it is unintentional, which somehow I doubt).

Paul said...

Hot maggots is my pick of the bunch. It's that "when" which does it for me.

Fabian Tassano said...

Health tip: maggots should be fried in olive oil rather than grease.

Anonymous said...

Check out http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/03/16/AR2007031600999.html

All the "students" are actually respectable adults, some even work for Dept. of Defense!